Unhappy marriage Islam | Fitrah Tawheed

Unhappy with your marriage

Feeling unhappy in a marriage is a hard thing to deal with and a consequence of marital problems. You might feel stuck and unable to feel alive emotionally anymore in such a marriage.

It is important to know why you would feel unhappy in your marriage. There can be many reasons for this. Maybe you were forced to marry someone you did not like, or you married a person who is unable to give you sufficient love and attention.

Whatever the case, being unhappy in a marriage is not a state which you would want to be in for a long period. Because being unhappy with your marriage can develop a depression and can drastically decrease your quality of life.

1. Identify the cause

What would be the cause for your unhappiness in this marriage? You will be able to move forward when you know what the causes are, for you can then seek help to overcome these issues.

Most Common Issues:
  • Lack of intimacy
  • Lack of attention
  • Forced marriage
  • Verbal abuse
  • Physical violence

2. Reflect

Consider thinking what you want to do further. You probably are feeling very down and exhausted with the fact that your partner is making you unhappy.

After having tried to resolve the issues which your marriage is dealing with right now, you may feel hopeless of change in the future.

Positive change and resolving marital issues is only possible with the input of the two partners. You cannot resolve marital issues yourself without the input of your partner. It is not your fault that you are dealing with this.

3. Get support and help

To feel unhappy in a marriage is not something someone would want to stay in. It is an abnormal situation to be in, because being unhappy means there are things going very wrong in the marriage.

Get online help from counselors who really understand what you are going through and who are willing to listen to your story.

Seek help from friends who are able to give you good advice on how to handle the situation.

4. Make a decision

If you are feeling unhappy for a long period of time and exhausted of chasing your partner to change without positive result, then you might want to consider divorce as a last resort.

It may not be something you would want to get immediately, as getting a divorce would also mean letting go of the time you have put into this marriage. So choosing for divorce will not be an easy choice to make, but it may be necessary.

You deserve to feel happy and content in your marriage, if your partner does not allow you to get this, then you can either get help or get a divorce.

Have you tried everything in your power to change the marital problems or situation without positive result, then a divorce is the last and right decision to make for your well-being.

Is it a punishment or a test?

Whenever you find yourself in an unhappy marriage, you may tend to believe that it is some form of punishment that you are in.

If you are a sincere person and do not want to upset Allah, then this might not be a punishment. Allah punishes certain people with a partner who can hurt them. These people would tend to be careless individuals who are going through life hurting others. If you are not such a kind of person, then it might be a test instead of a punishment.

Allah certainly does not want you to feel unhappy in a marriage. Sometimes He tests you with a bad partner, which it would then be up to you to get through it.

Maybe Allah wants to let you learn something new and valuable about life through this type of marriage. This does not mean you must stay in it and keep suffering.

Some couples are not meant to be with each other, and that is okay, Allah does not let you without any options.

Abu Athari writes about basic principles within Islam. He uses his critical and well-researched way to spread knowledge of the first three Muslim generations.

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