Marriage problems

What are marital problems?

Marital problems are situations occurring that are severely damaging the marriage. This can be anything between financial abuse, heavy arguments, neglect, and even physical violence.

These issues are very hard to deal with, and the person suffering from marital issues often feels a sense of hopelessness.

However, even when these issues are hard to deal with, that does not mean it cannot be tackled in order to free yourself from having to deal with this.

Sure, marriage is not meant to be without arguments, as humans are not perfect. We will make mistakes in marriage and can cause upset to those around us. This is only human, so having an argument with your partner is not the end of the world, nor should it be.

It becomes an issue if these arguments become many, without any solving happening. Whenever the couple is starting to break away from each other, little by little, without them solving the matter, then this will create bigger problems.

A marriage is meant to be a comfort for both the husband and the wife. Minor problems can be solved by the couple themselves or through intermediates. Whenever there are bigger problems, then the marriage has reached a level of chaos.

1. Identify the problem

You would want to identify the exact problems that you are dealing with in this marriage. Identifying the problem not only gives you clarity, but it helps you to move forward.

Identifying the problems helps you get clarity on what is causing your marriage to break. This could be anything from financial abuse to emotional abuse.

2. Express yourself to your partner

Expressing yourself to your partner means you communicate what is bothering you. Eventhough not every partner will allow you do to this, it is a must for solving the marital issues.

The reality is that not every partner gives you the oppurtunity to express yourself. This in itself is a major part of the problem.

In order for any solving of problems to take place, the partners must be open to communicate what is bothering them.

If you however do get the oppurtunity to communicate what bothers you, then bear in mind that you should communicate this in the best manner possible. Try to be direct, but in a soft manner. Avoid shaming the partner, for the partner may then close off to you.

3. Try marriage counseling

Marriage counseling is especially important if your partner is not willing to put an effort into solving the marital issues. Dragging him or her into counseling will not be very wise either, as this would waste your time.

If you see that your partner is not willing to self reflect, then forget the possibility of him or her changing. This is because self reflect is the pillar to change.

Your partner may be open to try marriage counseling, but this is only helpful when he or she does not blame you for everything and sees no fault in his or her own doing.

Marriage counseling can be a great way for couples to bring back peace into their marriage. The counselor is able to hear both sides and pinpoint the problems and how they are to be dealt with. This can only come into fruition when both are willing to self reflect and change.

4. Evaluation

When nothing seems to work, even after counseling or having intermediates from both families, then hopelessness will creep in even more.

Nothing seems to make a permanent change and the partner is still following his or her old ways in dealing with you.

At this stage, you should evaluate whether you still want to be in this relationship. Not every partner can suit your needs, even when your needs are the minimum.

And not every partner is willing to change their behavior, which makes it impossible for marital issues to disappear. It is helpful to seek for a second opinion on your evaluation and what you can do in this specific situation.